MORE THAN JUST THE CRUMBS


so i have this really good friend.
this friend is a dude.
this dude has taught me a lot.



in the recent past i have spent more time with this dude and have begun to realize something that i haven't for a long while, maybe even my whole life.



dude is a good dude. he is gentle and kind. every time i am with dude he makes me feel so good about myself. he is very complimentary, tells me how much he appreciates me, how much he is glad that i was born (that's a direct quote). he opens my doors for me, makes sure i have water if i need it, makes me feel like i am being taken care of in every way. he doesn't do this because he has romantic feelings for me...because he doesn't and i don't for him. but time and time again he tells me that more men should just treat women this way, just because they are men and we are women.



so last night, after spending some good quality time with two of the best men on the planet, i realized that by just being with them, listening to the way they talk about me, the way they lift me up... i shouldn't accept any less from the men with whom i'm dating.



it's not that i have NEVER spent time with a guy who treats me like this, on the contrary. but lately, i have realized that i have been willing to accept the crumbs of would-be suitors in hopes that eventually they will give me the whole piece. and i find myself giving more of myself then they do of themselves and walk away feeling rather silly.



but when i am with men that make me feel like i am the most amazing thing, i have no desire for crumbs. i see my self worth in a whole new way. i see how it is to feel good about myself just by being with someone that truly cares about me and wants to take care of me. would that we all had dudes in our lives to help us remember these things in such a way. if you want to borrow mine, let me know and i'll hook it up.


ladies, i submit that we will feel better about who we are when we stop accepting the bear minimum from the men we wish to be in our lives. stop taking the crumbs and trying to somehow turn them into whole cakes. eventually, someone will come into our lives that just can't wait to give more than the crumbs... what a feast that will be!!!