TO REALLY LOVE A WOMAN


a while ago, a friend of mine told me that while she was at her boyfriend's house, his roommate "pointed out" to her that she had "relief society arms" and even wanted her to show everyone in the room!!! EXCUSE ME???

(if you are asking yourself what rs arms are... think a very horrible term for the back of a woman's arm... if there is extra fat or skin there... which by the way... my friend SO DOES NOT HAVE!!!)

i don't think that i have been that livid in a really, really long time. it was like someone had lit a fire inside of me and thrown in 8 gallons of gas upon it... and pretty much that is what everyone in the room experienced... a mini explosion... cuss words and all! (sorry again guys)

before i launch into the next bit, i feel to say the following comment: let me just tell you how much i LOVE men. i generally love the company of men, the candid way of speaking, talking sports and all that goes along with being around testosterone. men are great.

with all of that being said, let me now proceed to giving men out there a piece of my mind... because if ever there was a hot button for me... this ignorant man certainly pushed it and the residue of his comment is still swarming around.

to men, (if it applies to you):
what gives you the right to talk to women about their bodies in ANYTHING but a positive, uplifting way? you don't think it's bad enough that we, as women, are bombarded every day of our lives with pornographic pictures of unrealistic women pasted EVERYWHERE, from tv/billboard/magazine/newspaper ads to logos, to televion, to music, to books, to radio... EVERYWHERE we turn we are faced with this idea that our bodies (the ones that Heavenly Father gave us... yeah... those ones) aren't good enough... we shouldn't be happy with them and certainly the men who love us aren't supposed to be happy with them because "we don't look like THAT" [pointing to the cover of some magazine with a fake-looking-beautiful-to-skinny model trying to look like she is the NORM]

because we are faced with these images on a minute to minute basis, many of us... from as early as 11 or12 (now we are seeing girls as young as 5) years old HATE everything about our bodies... and even more unfortunate... many of the beautiful, smart, AMAZING women i know today... still do! you don't think that for 2.5 seconds that we aren't already hard enough on ourselves??? that we don't already scrutinize every last flaw we see??? so for some pig-headed, insecure man to come along and think he has the right to say anything about a physical feature or what we are eating is absolutely disgusting to me.

believe me guys, i know you are not all like this... i promise. i have been fortunate to have FANTASTIC men in my life who love me and lift me up in ways only they can. i have listened to the way our prophet, Gordon B Hinckley, speaks to the women of our church and NEVER do i feel more powerful then when i hear him revere and admire women.

but i have also had the unfortunate experience of being in relationships with men who did not treat me in a way that would help me to know that i am beautiful inside and out... and unfortunately, those scars are extremely hard to heal. you have no idea how much weight your words carry or how lasting an affect (for the good or evil) they have on the precious women in your life.

to round this out, i am just going to finish this by pleading with all men that can hear my voice... please help us combat the horrible, insecure thoughts that wage a war in our minds every day. please be the one to lift, support and revere the women in your life... find yourself giving more compliments and don't forget to tell them they are beautiful-- physically as well as all of the other important ways. if it's one thing i know... the minute you start lifting the women in your life, you will be taken care of ten fold.


to all the women out there-- WE ARE BEAUTIFUL! (say it with me... raise your hands... higher... louder... that's what i'm talkin' 'bout)