3 a.m. VISITOR


yes, it's 3 a.m. actually, it's almost 4 but who cares, i'm up. and i am not just coherent- i'm freaking WIDE AWAKE and i am not happy about it. (the past two weeks have not been good sleep weeks and tonight was supposed to be my first time in a while to catch those all important zzz's)

so there i was in dreamland-- my psyche hard at work filtering through my issues and assigning strange scenarios and odd people to sort it all out-- when all of a sudden the person next to me in my dream begins crunching really loudly; like they were eating the largest carrot known to man. my brow furrows. i hate hearing people chew. i give a necessary crusty and continue forth with strange scenario when the chomping continues- this time much louder and then all of a sudden, my awake mind tells my psyche: "ummm excuse me, but you might want to register that that chomping noise is coming from about 4 real feet from your head."

my eyes shoot open and i spring forth from slumber.

okay, for those of you who don't know me-- i am a treat-aholic (amongst so many other desireable qualities)-- i like to have ready-available treats at my disposal in case of an emergency. what's even more interesting about this pile of shame that sits just to my left on the floor in a little wicker basket, is that i rarely eat from it. i know you don't believe it. but it's true. most often the stuff there goes untouched until i have friends come over and we sit on my bed and eat the loot while we talk. and i do take my fair share of teasing about this fact that at any given time my friends can come over and they know there's always a little somthin' somthin' to eat.

well it looks as though i had friends in places i didn't know about, that agree.

so there i am in the dark. i am frozen by the sound that has so rudely brought me back to reality. i wait... too scared to do anything (this is *one of those moments when having a husband laying in the bed next to me would be really really helpful- cause i'd make him get up and deal with it).

finally after a few minutes of silence i turn in attempt to go back to sleep. i'm not too far off when, again, the munching. this time i shoot up into the sitting position (you know how in movies when something wakes someone up they always end up pulling the covers to their chin as their nervous eyes survey the darkness? yeah, i totally did that). the munching ceases. now we wait. who can be quiet the longest (you... me... starring contest... now. you win... you always do!... 10 extra points if you got this reference)? i hear a scamper and i couldn't control he audible intake. the scamper ceases. i reach over and nudge the basket of goods. silence. what should i do? i don't want to go poking around and end up face to face with my thief at this time of night... knowing me i would end up jumping out of bed and running to sleep on the couch if i saw a furry anything just now.

so i turned my light on. decide to take a trip to the bathroom. creep back in hoping that i gave little gus-gus time to race back to the clan and tell the group that the game is up-- that freaky human-lady is no cinderalla, woke up in the middle of "the job" and ruined the fun.

now with the lights on... i'm a teeny tiny more brave and slowly begin to investigate the crime scene. and wouldn't this story be all that more interesting if i saw the culprit with his beady eyes and whiskered nose? yeah i didn't. but i did find where all the chomping was coming from. it turns out it wasn't my box of cheese nips like i thought. gus-gus is still working on the hole to get into the room. and it turns out i caught him just before making entry.

i feel like the germans in the movie "the great escape" right now. you vill not go any fuerzer den dis, my friend!

but seriously- does anyone know how to stop up a mouse hole?


*there are several other things also come to mind but we shant go into that.