SICK DAYS


it started out like any other head-cold last week... sinus-pressure, headache, aloofness. i was just like the actors on those cold medicine commercials- except for that squinty-eye-while-they -massage-their-temples thing that they do was for real and not fake or extremely exaggerated.

but i persevered. that's what you have to do when you are teaching 22, 5-7 year-olds how to become an alien, running to and from the 1 pm matinee and then staying at work til 7pm to make sure that the hoards of patrons coming to the next days' performance don't yell at you because their name was mis-spelled on the ticket.

the worst of it hit tuesday morning of this week. i knew it was bad when my boss put me in a cab and sent me home and cleaned my entire work space with bleach.

i got home at 2 pm... crawled into bed by 2:30... and i have been here ever since.

i have watched 6.3 movies in the last day and a half (i fell asleep through most of 13 going on 30).

i didn't have the energy to open the jar of pasta sauce for my dinner last night. the only person around to help me was my sweet but feeble roommate who also couldn't open it. i tried to scream i was so frustrated. but you can't scream when you've lost your voice... it's physically impossible... believe me...i tried.

i talked with a friend on the phone who after hearing me try to speak said "dude you sound like poo." i laughed and said "yeah i probably look like poo too" they agreed with me. then i hung up on them. okay no i didn't really- but that would have been really funny.

instead of a handsome, strong and truly supportive man laying next to me in my bed, it's a box of kleenex, 40 used tissues and an empty bag of doritos. no crumbs... i ate those... i was too tired to get up and make something else to eat. mmmmm.... crumbs.

everyone i know is sick right now- with the exact same crap. even the woman at HR where i work had a tale of her trip to the ER because she was that sick. what's the deal- i know they taught us in kindergarten to share- but this seems a little excessive, right?

dayquil really has my seal of approval. i woke up this morning with the most horrendous pain in my lungs. to cough was to send glass shards through my chest. i loaded up on dayquil and the world seemed to calm down all around me. yummy dayquil-ness. in gel-cap form though... no way you're getting me to drink that liquid crap.

i have left my room only 13 times in past 48 hours. the majority of those times were to pay homage to the toilet god. we're BFF now.

tomorrow i go into work at 1pm-- this will ensure that even if i do wake-up at 3 am with huge stomach pains and trips to my new BFF every 10 minutes AGAIN then i will get to sleep in and still have my energy for another great day as the box office guru. lucky me!