HELLO FROM 3 AM... AGAIN


once again i find myself wide awake when it seems as though all the world is peacefully slumbering... well not in the eastern part of the world where they're already well into the day.

the only difference between this time and the last time that i was miserably unable to sleep is the fact that this time, the insomnia is not drug-related. that's good right? or not so much.

i am so keyed up right now that my muscles actually feel like they are vibrating. lame.

guess that means it's time for a word vomit!

- i, once again, have said YES to too many things. i have been, unsuccessfully, trying to work on 5 different projects... so it always seems like i am 2 steps behind. i'm behind on calling people back, responding to emails/facebook stuff, trying to reschedule dinner dates or other such social exploits because i had to cancel. i feel like NOTHING is getting the attention it deserves... and that includes some of my favorite relationships. then it makes me feel guilt-ridden, and that NEVER does a body good!


- i feel like i have had more than my fair share of people snafu's over the past few weeks. i seem to either be putting my foot in my mouth, doing the wrong thing, not doing what i need to be doing, forgetting something or someone, or somehow being rude when i didn't know i was being rude. i just can't get it or keep it together this month!


- i'm worried about traveling in new countries all by myself. i've had two separate nightmares that i got lost in an airport in france and couldn't get to my connecting train on time... in one of the dreams i then had to sleep in the airport until the next day and i got stalked by a homeless man that sort of looked like PRINCE! anyone want to travel with me to italy in june?


- i'm worried about money for this summer. i know i shouldn't fret... the company will pay me each week and i should be just fine with the amount i'll have saved by the time i go... but i can't help but worry about the unknown.


- i sometimes feel trapped here in utah. i can't figure out what about utah makes me feel this way, but i feel it nonetheless. so the thought of staying here after i return from my summer 'o' fun, gets me a little moody... even with really cool things happening here that are on the horizon.

okay, i think that's enough for now. do we think this vomit has helped? i am hoping that the minute i push send it will also send along some lethargic vibes to my synapses and tell them to chill out so i can sleep for just a few hours.

i guess if this doesn't work, there's always counting sheep... right?